Getting Along Well With Oneself And Others Is The Crucial Ingredient For A Happy And Prosperous Life
Building a strong relationship with oneself is the first step. In my seminars, I ask participants to close their eyes for a minute and visualize The five faces. After the minute is over, I ask them to write down the names of faces they have visualized. In most of the cases the participants visualize others, be it their parents, relatives, friends, co-workers, but seldom themselves.
The reason few visualize themselves is, from a very young age, few are encouraged to think and be aware of them selves. When a child starts to walk around, and experience independence, often the elders are telling the child the do’s and don’ts in a manner that is dogmatic and intimidating. Growing up in a barrage of commands, a majority of us, end up not developing a healthy self-image
Two pillars of healthy relationships are a great relationship with oneself and a great relationship with others.
To build a healthy sense of self –esteem do the following: Love yourself and believe in yourself. Treat yourself well, physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. Eat well and exercise. Wear good clothes and maintain a clean and hygienic space around you. Read good books, listen to good music, and watch good movies to feed the mind with good information and stimuli. Forgive yourself often, guilt is negative energy, if you make a mistake, learn from it and move on. Learn and practice meditation and reflect on who you are and how you can make a positive difference to the people around you. Thank people around you for doing great things for you. When you thank others you will feel important, as others help you because you mean something to them. Do all of the above and more to feel like somebody.
Once you feel like somebody yourself, move on to make others around you feel like somebody. You have the power to make others feel like somebody. When you see a person, express the enthusiasm and concern you have for them, verbally and non-verbally. Applaud them when they do something right, with your eyes wide open, and energy in your words, the other person will feel important, and that will endear you to them. Practice opening your eyes wider, and animating your voice when you meet your family members, your co-workers and your friends, you will feel and see the difference.
Recently I had gone to the movies. Before entering the hall, I approached the ice cream stand to get a cone of my favorite flavor butterscotch. As I was approaching the ice cream stand I saw the youngster behind the counter dropping and depressed. As I walked up to him, I widened my eyes and wished him with enthusiasm and commented that he had the most powerful job in the world. I went on explain, that the scoop he had in his hand made all the difference to the amount of ice cream a person got in his cup or cone. All he had to do was to put a bit extra with his scoop and people would go happy, thanking him in their minds. On listening to my explanation, he asked me which flavour I wanted, on my requesting for the butterscotch, he put such strength in his arms and scooped up so much of the butter scotch that I literally jumped in excitement, and I could see him totally energized, for he realized that he is somebody. We all have the power to feel like somebody ourselves and make others feel like somebody. Let us do it and live great lives.